Gibberings
Dad told me never to use XTREE when he wasn’t in the room.
July 18, 2008 ~ 10:04:37 PM * -07:00ST
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Log # 423
2008-07-17: Coagulated Twittering
- @johnny_c As your father, it hurts me to hear you say that. We let you paint your room whatever color you wanted. #
- Joy: Approaching a woman standing outside the ladies’ room, inquiring if there’s a line (there is), and proceeding into the (empty) men’s. #
- @jhnenvee Oh god, sorry. I forgot. This is really more your speed: DAAAAHHH WHY U CANCEL ZIMM JOHNEN HUH? HONK DUH SLOBBER #
by
Eliza Gauger on July 17th, 2008 ~ 11:59:59 PM
Slotted into Twitter |
No Comments »
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Log # 422
2008-07-16: Coagulated Twittering
- @JhnenVEE Look, all of us at one time or another have craved a goatbox. It’s a pipe dream, my friend. Give it up. #
by
Eliza Gauger on July 16th, 2008 ~ 11:59:59 PM
Slotted into Twitter |
No Comments »
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Log # 415
2008-07-14: Coagulated Twittering
- Finally launching for LA. At the general store buying supplies and extra oxen. Can I eat an entire watermelon, by myself, on the interstate? #
- @jhnenvee But what if I have to trade it to the indians for help fording a parking lot? #
- Had to bribe my way across the San Joaquin county line with two wagon axles and our only washtub of corn liquor. #
- Stanislaus County checkpoint asked me if I’m Sunni or Shiite. Told em I worship Yog the Animal God, and would they care for a votive kibble? #
- Think I lost them at Crow’s Landing. Three oxen down to gunfire, a fourth to trailside IED, but I could only carry 100lbs back to the Jetta. #
- Horrible news. Had to trade my last unlistened-to episode of This American Life to the Merced County militia for safe passage. #
- Replenishing grease vats from Santa Nella area Popeye’s. Due to rewards programs interchange fees, cajun breading is cheaper with cash pay. #
- Back on the road. Can just about manage my “meal” by twofisting the chicken chunks, and wearing the potato cup as a hat. Biscuit issues. #
- Whole body now has dewy, Maxim-style sheen due to Popeye’s replenishing lipids. Having trouble maintaining deathgrip on just about anything. #
- Cowschwitz. If you’re the serial killer in my backseat that’s been clamping farts since Alameda, now’s the chance for relief on the DL. #
by
Eliza Gauger on July 14th, 2008 ~ 11:59:59 PM
Slotted into Twitter |
No Comments »
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Log # 414
2008-07-13: Coagulated Twittering
- @xseven re: new music - #1 - Bohren and der Club of Gore: David Lynchian ambient-noir. The soundtrack to a post-Blade Runner Edward Hooper. #
- @xseven re: new music - #2 - “Wonderland”, an album by Pogo using 90% samples from Disney’s Alice in Wonderland: http://tinyurl.com/6pesre #
- FreeRice.com is doing an excellent job of alternately rewarding my sesquipedalianism, and deepening reserves of obscure language. Hosannah. #
by
Eliza Gauger on July 13th, 2008 ~ 11:59:59 PM
Slotted into Twitter |
No Comments »
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Log # 413
2008-07-12: Coagulated Twittering
- http://elizagauger.etsy.com - for all your Bat Smax needs, now open 24 hours a day, 7 days a week. #
- @samanthrax That’s why you put the milk in FIRST. #
- Working floor at DNA Lounge. Gay party night. Girl just unleashed her bladder upon the floor, on purpose. The fairer sex, ladies and gents. #
- It figures, that even on gay Latin night, it’s the stupid bitches that fuck everything up. If you have a vagina, I hate you now. Forever. #
- Imagine it: you’re there, right, surrounded by men who won’t have sex with you. You have to take advantage of being judgment proof for once. #
- You have to do it: You have to whiz all over yourself, your toes all pee-squishy, then you gotta dance in it until security throws you out. #
- A fat drunk girl has just been escorted offstage for Being Too Hetero, Booty Shaking Badly, and trying to Fondle the Twinkmeat. #
- I am watching a Berkeley police officer drive his cruiser while chatting merrily on his cell phone. #
- GENTLEMEN: Earl Grey, hot, with a dash of french vanilla and chocolate. It needs a shot of steamed milk, but I have approached perfection. #
- The GTA series always had the most porous virtual/reality walls. Just now, in 7-11, a man answered his cell: “‘Eyyy Nico! What’s up, man?!” #
by
Eliza Gauger on July 12th, 2008 ~ 11:59:59 PM
Slotted into Twitter |
No Comments »
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Log # 411
2008-07-05: Coagulated Twittering
- @scamper Many thanks. Welcome to my own personal bullshit delivery system. #
- @GrammarBlog: http://is.gd/Mbj - Here ya go, one more reason to hate the universe! #
- Just got an asian paper lantern with included LED “candle” that flickers and is turned on and off by blowing on it. W. Oakland dollar store. #
- This casual propagation of what is, at its heart, miracle technology… Sometimes it tugs at my innards, makes me think maybe there’s hope. #
- @isforinsects seems to have come up with a partial solution for my 6/29 limerissue: he cuts them in half. This may or may not be acceptable. #
- @xSeven why don’t you just leave? In related news, @intoner is working floor at Paul Oakenfold in SF right now. Hoping for hateful tweets. #
- Douchebags still blasting shitty bass at 2AM. I pound the door and the junkie answers with an incredibly small boner tenting his PE shorts. #
- What I can’t figure out, is how this passel of wheat-blonde Berkeley fratboys is here, Oakland, arid homeland of thugs and goths. Why here? #
- I’ll be honest. I’m a wee bit upset that no one bothered to tell me that hair cuts, via a razor-cutter, are perfectly self-administratable. #
- http://twitpic.com/386v - Testing the arachnid medical fetish porn delivery system. Report in with results, erectile response, poll numbers. #
- @GrammarBlog You did that on purpose, you jerk. #
by
Eliza Gauger on July 5th, 2008 ~ 11:59:59 PM
Slotted into Twitter |
No Comments »
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Log # 410
2008-06-29: Coagulated Twittering
- Size of the average limerick is approximately 150 characters. Damn it. There goes the greatest syndicated content usage idea I’ve ever had. #
- Been clearing boxes and drifts of packing peanuts away from where I think the draft’s coming from. There’s a familiar, not unpleasant smell. #
- The Douchebags Downstairs love to crank their bass, thudding shitty rap through my floorboards. I gently tip my subwoofer into a headstand. #
- I unleash God of War to do bass battle with whatever sag-panted idiot is championing their noise. Another 200. to go on the sub knob, gents. #
by
Eliza Gauger on June 29th, 2008 ~ 11:59:59 PM
Slotted into Twitter |
No Comments »
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Log # 408
2008-06-28: Coagulated Twittering
- Taking inventory of lucite-encased goblins, backstage at the Bone Room. Also seem to have located where the bad draft has been coming from. #
- These days I’m finding that doing anything besides sitting and drawing produces a low hum of panic, like I am cheating on a well-armed wife. #
by
Eliza Gauger on June 28th, 2008 ~ 11:59:59 PM
Slotted into Twitter |
No Comments »
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Log # 406
2008-06-27: Coagulated Twittering
- @jhnenvee Thank god I won’t have to bring my water balloon cannon and pig blood funnel to the theater this time. Thank god. #
- Though I’m a hateful misanthrope, I daydream sometimes about a high-functioning sort of art commune, an unbeatable collective of characters. #
- Morning was spent at my window desk, drawing a troll, taking in the view. By necessity,those out at 5am in West Oakland are up to something. #
by
Eliza Gauger on June 27th, 2008 ~ 11:59:59 PM
Slotted into Twitter |
1 Comment »
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Log # 404
Though I’m a hateful misanthro…
Slotted into Twitter | No Comments »
2008-07-16: Coagulated Twittering
- @JhnenVEE Look, all of us at one time or another have craved a goatbox. It’s a pipe dream, my friend. Give it up. #
by
Eliza Gauger on July 16th, 2008 ~ 11:59:59 PM
Slotted into Twitter |
No Comments »
----------------------------------
Log # 415
2008-07-14: Coagulated Twittering
- Finally launching for LA. At the general store buying supplies and extra oxen. Can I eat an entire watermelon, by myself, on the interstate? #
- @jhnenvee But what if I have to trade it to the indians for help fording a parking lot? #
- Had to bribe my way across the San Joaquin county line with two wagon axles and our only washtub of corn liquor. #
- Stanislaus County checkpoint asked me if I’m Sunni or Shiite. Told em I worship Yog the Animal God, and would they care for a votive kibble? #
- Think I lost them at Crow’s Landing. Three oxen down to gunfire, a fourth to trailside IED, but I could only carry 100lbs back to the Jetta. #
- Horrible news. Had to trade my last unlistened-to episode of This American Life to the Merced County militia for safe passage. #
- Replenishing grease vats from Santa Nella area Popeye’s. Due to rewards programs interchange fees, cajun breading is cheaper with cash pay. #
- Back on the road. Can just about manage my “meal” by twofisting the chicken chunks, and wearing the potato cup as a hat. Biscuit issues. #
- Whole body now has dewy, Maxim-style sheen due to Popeye’s replenishing lipids. Having trouble maintaining deathgrip on just about anything. #
- Cowschwitz. If you’re the serial killer in my backseat that’s been clamping farts since Alameda, now’s the chance for relief on the DL. #
by
Eliza Gauger on July 14th, 2008 ~ 11:59:59 PM
Slotted into Twitter |
No Comments »
----------------------------------
----------------------------------
Log # 414
2008-07-13: Coagulated Twittering
- @xseven re: new music - #1 - Bohren and der Club of Gore: David Lynchian ambient-noir. The soundtrack to a post-Blade Runner Edward Hooper. #
- @xseven re: new music - #2 - “Wonderland”, an album by Pogo using 90% samples from Disney’s Alice in Wonderland: http://tinyurl.com/6pesre #
- FreeRice.com is doing an excellent job of alternately rewarding my sesquipedalianism, and deepening reserves of obscure language. Hosannah. #
by
Eliza Gauger on July 13th, 2008 ~ 11:59:59 PM
Slotted into Twitter |
No Comments »
----------------------------------
----------------------------------
Log # 413
2008-07-12: Coagulated Twittering
- http://elizagauger.etsy.com - for all your Bat Smax needs, now open 24 hours a day, 7 days a week. #
- @samanthrax That’s why you put the milk in FIRST. #
- Working floor at DNA Lounge. Gay party night. Girl just unleashed her bladder upon the floor, on purpose. The fairer sex, ladies and gents. #
- It figures, that even on gay Latin night, it’s the stupid bitches that fuck everything up. If you have a vagina, I hate you now. Forever. #
- Imagine it: you’re there, right, surrounded by men who won’t have sex with you. You have to take advantage of being judgment proof for once. #
- You have to do it: You have to whiz all over yourself, your toes all pee-squishy, then you gotta dance in it until security throws you out. #
- A fat drunk girl has just been escorted offstage for Being Too Hetero, Booty Shaking Badly, and trying to Fondle the Twinkmeat. #
- I am watching a Berkeley police officer drive his cruiser while chatting merrily on his cell phone. #
- GENTLEMEN: Earl Grey, hot, with a dash of french vanilla and chocolate. It needs a shot of steamed milk, but I have approached perfection. #
- The GTA series always had the most porous virtual/reality walls. Just now, in 7-11, a man answered his cell: “‘Eyyy Nico! What’s up, man?!” #
by
Eliza Gauger on July 12th, 2008 ~ 11:59:59 PM
Slotted into Twitter |
No Comments »
----------------------------------
----------------------------------
Log # 411
2008-07-05: Coagulated Twittering
- @scamper Many thanks. Welcome to my own personal bullshit delivery system. #
- @GrammarBlog: http://is.gd/Mbj - Here ya go, one more reason to hate the universe! #
- Just got an asian paper lantern with included LED “candle” that flickers and is turned on and off by blowing on it. W. Oakland dollar store. #
- This casual propagation of what is, at its heart, miracle technology… Sometimes it tugs at my innards, makes me think maybe there’s hope. #
- @isforinsects seems to have come up with a partial solution for my 6/29 limerissue: he cuts them in half. This may or may not be acceptable. #
- @xSeven why don’t you just leave? In related news, @intoner is working floor at Paul Oakenfold in SF right now. Hoping for hateful tweets. #
- Douchebags still blasting shitty bass at 2AM. I pound the door and the junkie answers with an incredibly small boner tenting his PE shorts. #
- What I can’t figure out, is how this passel of wheat-blonde Berkeley fratboys is here, Oakland, arid homeland of thugs and goths. Why here? #
- I’ll be honest. I’m a wee bit upset that no one bothered to tell me that hair cuts, via a razor-cutter, are perfectly self-administratable. #
- http://twitpic.com/386v - Testing the arachnid medical fetish porn delivery system. Report in with results, erectile response, poll numbers. #
- @GrammarBlog You did that on purpose, you jerk. #
by
Eliza Gauger on July 5th, 2008 ~ 11:59:59 PM
Slotted into Twitter |
No Comments »
----------------------------------
----------------------------------
Log # 410
2008-06-29: Coagulated Twittering
- Size of the average limerick is approximately 150 characters. Damn it. There goes the greatest syndicated content usage idea I’ve ever had. #
- Been clearing boxes and drifts of packing peanuts away from where I think the draft’s coming from. There’s a familiar, not unpleasant smell. #
- The Douchebags Downstairs love to crank their bass, thudding shitty rap through my floorboards. I gently tip my subwoofer into a headstand. #
- I unleash God of War to do bass battle with whatever sag-panted idiot is championing their noise. Another 200. to go on the sub knob, gents. #
by
Eliza Gauger on June 29th, 2008 ~ 11:59:59 PM
Slotted into Twitter |
No Comments »
----------------------------------
----------------------------------
Log # 408
2008-06-28: Coagulated Twittering
- Taking inventory of lucite-encased goblins, backstage at the Bone Room. Also seem to have located where the bad draft has been coming from. #
- These days I’m finding that doing anything besides sitting and drawing produces a low hum of panic, like I am cheating on a well-armed wife. #
by
Eliza Gauger on June 28th, 2008 ~ 11:59:59 PM
Slotted into Twitter |
No Comments »
----------------------------------
----------------------------------
Log # 406
2008-06-27: Coagulated Twittering
- @jhnenvee Thank god I won’t have to bring my water balloon cannon and pig blood funnel to the theater this time. Thank god. #
- Though I’m a hateful misanthrope, I daydream sometimes about a high-functioning sort of art commune, an unbeatable collective of characters. #
- Morning was spent at my window desk, drawing a troll, taking in the view. By necessity,those out at 5am in West Oakland are up to something. #
by
Eliza Gauger on June 27th, 2008 ~ 11:59:59 PM
Slotted into Twitter |
1 Comment »
----------------------------------
----------------------------------
Log # 404
Though I’m a hateful misanthro…
Slotted into Twitter | No Comments »
2008-07-13: Coagulated Twittering
- @xseven re: new music - #1 - Bohren and der Club of Gore: David Lynchian ambient-noir. The soundtrack to a post-Blade Runner Edward Hooper. #
- @xseven re: new music - #2 - “Wonderland”, an album by Pogo using 90% samples from Disney’s Alice in Wonderland: http://tinyurl.com/6pesre #
- FreeRice.com is doing an excellent job of alternately rewarding my sesquipedalianism, and deepening reserves of obscure language. Hosannah. #
by
Eliza Gauger on July 13th, 2008 ~ 11:59:59 PM
Slotted into Twitter |
No Comments »
----------------------------------
Log # 413
2008-07-12: Coagulated Twittering
- http://elizagauger.etsy.com - for all your Bat Smax needs, now open 24 hours a day, 7 days a week. #
- @samanthrax That’s why you put the milk in FIRST. #
- Working floor at DNA Lounge. Gay party night. Girl just unleashed her bladder upon the floor, on purpose. The fairer sex, ladies and gents. #
- It figures, that even on gay Latin night, it’s the stupid bitches that fuck everything up. If you have a vagina, I hate you now. Forever. #
- Imagine it: you’re there, right, surrounded by men who won’t have sex with you. You have to take advantage of being judgment proof for once. #
- You have to do it: You have to whiz all over yourself, your toes all pee-squishy, then you gotta dance in it until security throws you out. #
- A fat drunk girl has just been escorted offstage for Being Too Hetero, Booty Shaking Badly, and trying to Fondle the Twinkmeat. #
- I am watching a Berkeley police officer drive his cruiser while chatting merrily on his cell phone. #
- GENTLEMEN: Earl Grey, hot, with a dash of french vanilla and chocolate. It needs a shot of steamed milk, but I have approached perfection. #
- The GTA series always had the most porous virtual/reality walls. Just now, in 7-11, a man answered his cell: “‘Eyyy Nico! What’s up, man?!” #
by
Eliza Gauger on July 12th, 2008 ~ 11:59:59 PM
Slotted into Twitter |
No Comments »
----------------------------------
----------------------------------
Log # 411
2008-07-05: Coagulated Twittering
- @scamper Many thanks. Welcome to my own personal bullshit delivery system. #
- @GrammarBlog: http://is.gd/Mbj - Here ya go, one more reason to hate the universe! #
- Just got an asian paper lantern with included LED “candle” that flickers and is turned on and off by blowing on it. W. Oakland dollar store. #
- This casual propagation of what is, at its heart, miracle technology… Sometimes it tugs at my innards, makes me think maybe there’s hope. #
- @isforinsects seems to have come up with a partial solution for my 6/29 limerissue: he cuts them in half. This may or may not be acceptable. #
- @xSeven why don’t you just leave? In related news, @intoner is working floor at Paul Oakenfold in SF right now. Hoping for hateful tweets. #
- Douchebags still blasting shitty bass at 2AM. I pound the door and the junkie answers with an incredibly small boner tenting his PE shorts. #
- What I can’t figure out, is how this passel of wheat-blonde Berkeley fratboys is here, Oakland, arid homeland of thugs and goths. Why here? #
- I’ll be honest. I’m a wee bit upset that no one bothered to tell me that hair cuts, via a razor-cutter, are perfectly self-administratable. #
- http://twitpic.com/386v - Testing the arachnid medical fetish porn delivery system. Report in with results, erectile response, poll numbers. #
- @GrammarBlog You did that on purpose, you jerk. #
by
Eliza Gauger on July 5th, 2008 ~ 11:59:59 PM
Slotted into Twitter |
No Comments »
----------------------------------
----------------------------------
Log # 410
2008-06-29: Coagulated Twittering
- Size of the average limerick is approximately 150 characters. Damn it. There goes the greatest syndicated content usage idea I’ve ever had. #
- Been clearing boxes and drifts of packing peanuts away from where I think the draft’s coming from. There’s a familiar, not unpleasant smell. #
- The Douchebags Downstairs love to crank their bass, thudding shitty rap through my floorboards. I gently tip my subwoofer into a headstand. #
- I unleash God of War to do bass battle with whatever sag-panted idiot is championing their noise. Another 200. to go on the sub knob, gents. #
by
Eliza Gauger on June 29th, 2008 ~ 11:59:59 PM
Slotted into Twitter |
No Comments »
----------------------------------
----------------------------------
Log # 408
2008-06-28: Coagulated Twittering
- Taking inventory of lucite-encased goblins, backstage at the Bone Room. Also seem to have located where the bad draft has been coming from. #
- These days I’m finding that doing anything besides sitting and drawing produces a low hum of panic, like I am cheating on a well-armed wife. #
by
Eliza Gauger on June 28th, 2008 ~ 11:59:59 PM
Slotted into Twitter |
No Comments »
----------------------------------
----------------------------------
Log # 406
2008-06-27: Coagulated Twittering
- @jhnenvee Thank god I won’t have to bring my water balloon cannon and pig blood funnel to the theater this time. Thank god. #
- Though I’m a hateful misanthrope, I daydream sometimes about a high-functioning sort of art commune, an unbeatable collective of characters. #
- Morning was spent at my window desk, drawing a troll, taking in the view. By necessity,those out at 5am in West Oakland are up to something. #
by
Eliza Gauger on June 27th, 2008 ~ 11:59:59 PM
Slotted into Twitter |
1 Comment »
----------------------------------
----------------------------------
Log # 404
Though I’m a hateful misanthro…
Slotted into Twitter | No Comments »
2008-07-05: Coagulated Twittering
- @scamper Many thanks. Welcome to my own personal bullshit delivery system. #
- @GrammarBlog: http://is.gd/Mbj - Here ya go, one more reason to hate the universe! #
- Just got an asian paper lantern with included LED “candle” that flickers and is turned on and off by blowing on it. W. Oakland dollar store. #
- This casual propagation of what is, at its heart, miracle technology… Sometimes it tugs at my innards, makes me think maybe there’s hope. #
- @isforinsects seems to have come up with a partial solution for my 6/29 limerissue: he cuts them in half. This may or may not be acceptable. #
- @xSeven why don’t you just leave? In related news, @intoner is working floor at Paul Oakenfold in SF right now. Hoping for hateful tweets. #
- Douchebags still blasting shitty bass at 2AM. I pound the door and the junkie answers with an incredibly small boner tenting his PE shorts. #
- What I can’t figure out, is how this passel of wheat-blonde Berkeley fratboys is here, Oakland, arid homeland of thugs and goths. Why here? #
- I’ll be honest. I’m a wee bit upset that no one bothered to tell me that hair cuts, via a razor-cutter, are perfectly self-administratable. #
- http://twitpic.com/386v - Testing the arachnid medical fetish porn delivery system. Report in with results, erectile response, poll numbers. #
- @GrammarBlog You did that on purpose, you jerk. #
by
Eliza Gauger on July 5th, 2008 ~ 11:59:59 PM
Slotted into Twitter |
No Comments »
----------------------------------
Log # 410
2008-06-29: Coagulated Twittering
- Size of the average limerick is approximately 150 characters. Damn it. There goes the greatest syndicated content usage idea I’ve ever had. #
- Been clearing boxes and drifts of packing peanuts away from where I think the draft’s coming from. There’s a familiar, not unpleasant smell. #
- The Douchebags Downstairs love to crank their bass, thudding shitty rap through my floorboards. I gently tip my subwoofer into a headstand. #
- I unleash God of War to do bass battle with whatever sag-panted idiot is championing their noise. Another 200. to go on the sub knob, gents. #
by
Eliza Gauger on June 29th, 2008 ~ 11:59:59 PM
Slotted into Twitter |
No Comments »
----------------------------------
----------------------------------
Log # 408
2008-06-28: Coagulated Twittering
- Taking inventory of lucite-encased goblins, backstage at the Bone Room. Also seem to have located where the bad draft has been coming from. #
- These days I’m finding that doing anything besides sitting and drawing produces a low hum of panic, like I am cheating on a well-armed wife. #
by
Eliza Gauger on June 28th, 2008 ~ 11:59:59 PM
Slotted into Twitter |
No Comments »
----------------------------------
----------------------------------
Log # 406
2008-06-27: Coagulated Twittering
- @jhnenvee Thank god I won’t have to bring my water balloon cannon and pig blood funnel to the theater this time. Thank god. #
- Though I’m a hateful misanthrope, I daydream sometimes about a high-functioning sort of art commune, an unbeatable collective of characters. #
- Morning was spent at my window desk, drawing a troll, taking in the view. By necessity,those out at 5am in West Oakland are up to something. #
by
Eliza Gauger on June 27th, 2008 ~ 11:59:59 PM
Slotted into Twitter |
1 Comment »
----------------------------------
----------------------------------
Log # 404
Though I’m a hateful misanthro…
Slotted into Twitter | No Comments »
2008-06-28: Coagulated Twittering
- Taking inventory of lucite-encased goblins, backstage at the Bone Room. Also seem to have located where the bad draft has been coming from. #
- These days I’m finding that doing anything besides sitting and drawing produces a low hum of panic, like I am cheating on a well-armed wife. #
by
Eliza Gauger on June 28th, 2008 ~ 11:59:59 PM
Slotted into Twitter |
No Comments »
----------------------------------
Log # 406
2008-06-27: Coagulated Twittering
- @jhnenvee Thank god I won’t have to bring my water balloon cannon and pig blood funnel to the theater this time. Thank god. #
- Though I’m a hateful misanthrope, I daydream sometimes about a high-functioning sort of art commune, an unbeatable collective of characters. #
- Morning was spent at my window desk, drawing a troll, taking in the view. By necessity,those out at 5am in West Oakland are up to something. #
by
Eliza Gauger on June 27th, 2008 ~ 11:59:59 PM
Slotted into Twitter |
1 Comment »
----------------------------------
----------------------------------
Log # 404
Though I’m a hateful misanthro…
Slotted into Twitter | 1 Comment »
Though I’m a hateful misanthro…
Though I’m a hateful misanthrope, I daydream sometimes about a high-functioning sort of art commune, an unbeatable collective of characters.
