Gibberings
Dad told me never to use XTREE when he wasn’t in the room.
July 18, 2008 ~ 10:00:14 PM * -07:00ST
----------------------------------
Log # 412
Congress launches “Prints for Rent” program in outer Oort Colonies
That’s right, droogles: prints are back in action on my Etsy store. I have a brand new printer and a shitload of mailing supplies.
go go go fucking go
Also still available: Twilight in the Roach Fields, which I am thinking about reducing in price.
by
Eliza Gauger on July 10th, 2008 ~ 02:09:32 AM
Slotted into Artwork, Etsy |
No Comments »
----------------------------------
Log # 395
The Golden Age of Prints Approacheth (Again)
As I type this, I am one-fisting a foiled chicken burrito, naked, praying for death or at least coma.
I keep telling myself that Seattle will be worse this summer, that at least in Death Valley there is interesting wildlife and free-for-the-taking transients on every corner. I made the right choice, I say, wheezing. Gas may be five dollars per gallon, but all my motors run on hate. I’ll be fine.
I laid down a sizable smatter of smackers for a replacement printer today, meaning that the Etsy store is about to go back up.
ECTOBEE: I gonna die.
STICKYPIG: this heat is horrid.
ECTOBEE: I don’t even have AC.
ECTOBEE: I’m gonna be one of those old people you hear about, found jerkified on their sofas.
STICKYPIG: they will find you, full of sadness, but still start chewing on you.
When I stand up, my little folding camp chair remains adhered to my generous buttocks. I do this for you.
by
Eliza Gauger on June 20th, 2008 ~ 06:43:46 PM
Slotted into Artwork, Depressing, Etsy, Hate, Paintings, Photography |
1 Comment »
----------------------------------
Log # 338
New on Etsy: 15×15 Framed Original Oil Painting of ANYTHING YOU WANT
http://www.etsy.com/view_listing.php?listing_id=10052760
This is your only chance to get into my brain, to force my hand, to make me into your angry clown puppet: I will paint anything you want on this canvas.
Portrait of the family pet? Grim visions of the future? Mounted depiction of your level 70 Undead Warlock? Jackson Pollock-style paint sneezes? Cavorting jellysquid in a chartreuse sea? Please, give me the most insane instructions you can come up with. I will not disappoint.
I generally use oil paint and copal medium, a synthetic resin that allows me to build up translucent glazes into paintings of intense depth and texture.
Estimated time for completion of this commission is two weeks. Rush orders are available for an additional fee.
WHAT I NEED FROM YOU:
- a description or photos of what you want painted.
- a few general notes about what you imagine the painting should be (”I want lots of greens and purples”, “I want him to be standing on top of a pile of dead cheerleaders”, I want the piece to exude an indefinable menace”)
WHAT YOU WILL RECEIVE:
- a beautiful, 15 x 15″ original oil painting on stretched canvas, framed, to do with whatsoever you chose.
by
Eliza Gauger on March 5th, 2008 ~ 07:29:36 PM
Slotted into Artwork, Etsy, Paintings |
No Comments »
----------------------------------
Log # 335
New on Etsy: Hoard
http://www.etsy.com/view_listing.php?listing_id=10008213
The Aristocrats of the Metropolis care for nothing more than years, making dynasties obsolete as they persevere into one decade after another, buoyed by “rejuvenation treatments” that leave them dusty and raw.
As the years tick on, their delicately-bred brains tend towards eccentricity, and clutter.
Illustration from Unhallowed Metropolis (www.newdarkage.net)
Printed on heavyweight, archival, matte paper. Signed by the artist.
8.5 x 11″ & 5 x 7″ available.
by
Eliza Gauger on March 4th, 2008 ~ 04:40:55 AM
Slotted into Artwork, Etsy, Photography, Steampunk, Unhallowed Metropolis |
No Comments »
----------------------------------
Log # 334
New on Etsy: Twilight in the Roachfields (What I Did on My Summer Vacation)
Now available for purchase: www.etsy.com/view_listing.php?listing_id=9974267
Picking up pets offworld was generally frowned upon by the Company, as there were no quarantine facilities beyond the Oort.
Foreign mammalia carried strange strains of crippling flu, shed itchy fibers on cockpit upholstery, and left crumbly little fewmets in secret places, fewmets that became apparent, and airborne, as soon as a ship hit ohgee.
Loneliness was somewhat alleviated, yes, but at the cost of vacation time squandered on bad worlds, stocking up on exotic feed.
ABOUT THE PIECE:
Oil on collage, 5 x 7″
This was painted, over the course of a year, on a canvas that has been worked and reworked, sanded, gessoed, sanded again, glazed, rubbed, painted, scraped, and painted again. Dozens of layers of jewel-tone copal resin give the colors depth, like a stack of stained-glass windows. The duotone triadic harmony of the purple and green make the colors jump and glow. The surface shines like a candy glaze.
This painting will be shipped in a reinforced, padded envelope, and inside a sealed plastic sleeve to prevent contamination and dampening.
At some point, I may ask to borrow this painting for a gallery show. If this happens, I will pay for all shipping costs, the painting will be displayed with a card that credits you as the owner, and the painting will be returned to you at the end of the show.
Hit the jump for larger images.
by
Eliza Gauger on March 2nd, 2008 ~ 06:06:55 PM
Slotted into Artwork, Etsy, Future, Paintings, Space |
No Comments »
----------------------------------
Log # 330
Street Vamp Chosen for “Noir” Treasury on Etsy
http://www.etsy.com/treasury_list.php?room_id=30887
by
Eliza Gauger on February 26th, 2008 ~ 01:37:53 PM
Slotted into Artwork, Etsy, Unhallowed Metropolis |
No Comments »
----------------------------------
Log # 306
New on Etsy: Voyage of the Rusty Pearl
http://www.etsy.com/view_listing.php?listing_id=9352550
A story told in glints, patinas and sea-spray, committed to a square of paper and a fading recollection. Leave this in a trunk in the attic, for your grandchildren to find.
A unique, hand-made necklace. A portrait of a tall ship amidst a clutch of chains, pearls, and tiny keys. Each component has been carefully treated and antiqued, and assembled in a graceful, yet sturdy drape. The “glass” on the ship is waterproof, yet ancient-looking, with slight oxidization around the edges.
This is a necklace that will last you a long time, barring any misadventure involving flames or industrial solvents. But really, aren’t those the best kind of misadventures?
Chain is 15″ long and fastens in front for easy handling.
Bigger photos available at Etsy.
by
Eliza Gauger on February 4th, 2008 ~ 03:21:05 AM
Slotted into Etsy, Fashion, Pirates, The Sea |
No Comments »
----------------------------------
Log # 303
New on Etsy: the Phobic Notebook
http://www.etsy.com/view_listing.php?listing_id=9348301
Record moments of gut-wrenching horror, in miniature, in this little “fear of E” notebook. On the front cover: a scrolling list of phobias beginning with the letter E, from Ecclesiophobia to Ergophobia. The back is similarly covered, but in shades of D.
This book has been custom painted with oils to produce a beautiful sepia vignette and stained edges on the pages, and decoupaged [ha ha ha ha, "decoupage"] with a vintage sewing pattern. It closes with a fine ribbon and snap arrangement, topped by a typewriter-key letter E.
3″ x 4″, lined paper
EDIT: Holy shit that was fast. I guess people like tiny notebooks, huh?
by
Eliza Gauger on February 3rd, 2008 ~ 08:04:39 PM
Slotted into Etsy |
No Comments »
----------------------------------
Log # 301
New on Etsy: 5 x 7″ prints! Smaller! Cheaper!
I note with consternation that no one has purchased an Occultist Psychic yet. What, the little rat on her shoulder isn’t CUTE enough for you?
by
Eliza Gauger on February 2nd, 2008 ~ 03:26:58 PM
Slotted into Artwork, Etsy |
No Comments »
----------------------------------
Log # 295
Price Reduced on “Red Sky Over the Vault”
A story of love and loss in the desert, now priced to move. This is an original oil painting, never scanned or reproduced except for these photos, and prints will never be sold.
Now on Etsy for $194.15
