Gibberings
Dad told me never to use XTREE when he wasn’t in the room.
August 19, 2008 ~ 10:51:22 PM * -07:00ST
----------------------------------
Log # 40
Dead Man’s All-You-Can-Eat Calamari Buffet
I went to see Dead Man’s Chest opening night, first showing, all that nonsense. It held my attention all the way up until Squidbeard (played by a Bill Nighy who’s good to watch, but very undefined) gets doublecrossed by Jack for the first time. He’s on deck, surrounded by his fishy crew. And he opens the treasure chest…and there’s nothing inside…and he grits his teeth and tilts his head back and yells SPAAAARROWWWWWWWW and the camera zooms wayyyyy out.
I think that was when I knew for sure the movie was dead, and wasn’t coming back.
There’s a voodoo lady that’s damn keen, and the cursed crew of Innsmouthy fishpirates is neat, but Depp cakewalks, Bloom snores, and Knightly is unremarkable. There’s about a dozen plotlines and they’re all stupid.
There’s some genuinely fun swashbuckling, some vaguely interesting slash (the Sparrow and Elizabeth scenes could have been fun, maybe, if it weren’t so completely overwhelmed and if Sparrow was actually a character in this instead of a Hot Topic screenprint) and actually for about the first half of the film I was having a good time. But it’s two and a half hours long and once the poorly-animated Kraken shows up and the swordfights and explosions start in earnest, they DO NOT STOP. And you just sort of go numb and slump over in your seat.
And then you leave, feeling mightily abused.
That said, there’s a fabulous preview for a movie about a natural history museum and what happens there at night, which is something I was remarking to my friend about, when I went to the Field Museum in Chicago a few weeks ago. My concept was more of a zombie movie where the infection gets into the mummies and skeletons in the collection, but this is almost the same idea.
by
Eliza Gauger on July 8th, 2006 ~ 03:16:01 AM
Slotted into Pirates, Reviews |
2 Comments »
----------------------------------
Log # 38
Splode
Spent the star-spangled evening in the good company of the flock of feral fetish models I have befriended via fashion shows.
Parties hosted by fetish models are exactly what your perverted brain is imagining: lots of good-looking girls in tight clothing playing kissing games and striking each other about the thighs and shapely buttocks.
You know that scene in Animal House where Bluto clambers up the side of a sorority house to observe a barechested pillowfight between nubile members of the blonde brigade? Of course you do.
It’s just like that, but with more eyeliner.
The only difference between your fantasy wonderland and my vinyl-slick reality, is that the girls all bring their men. These fellows act as enthusiastic but slightly withdrawn audience members, rarely deigning to become involved even when asked, nay, ordered.
And I am always the third party, observing in a smirky sort of way and cracking wise. Sketching, sometimes.
But the point is that my eyebrows look fantastically weird tonight. Cartoonish. Very much like my Toovibohnes pic.
by
Eliza Gauger on July 5th, 2006 ~ 05:51:12 AM
Slotted into Fetish Models |
3 Comments »
----------------------------------
Log # 14
On the New Deal
I am now almost fully functioning over at Wordpress. Thanks to Leeny and Cambler for hooking me up with the install and hosting, and thanks to for hosting me for all those years.
I will now soothe your burning curiosity with a medicinal and informative balm:
Pwease tell me Elizoid, what you using to push posts to LJ?
I am using a WordPress plugin called LJ Crossposter, or LJXP for short. It seems to do more than push, it MAINTAINS. So when I delete a post from WP, it’s deleted from LJ as well. I think it also edits LJ when I edit WP. Not sure about the last two.
But…but…will you be posting on LJ still?
Mebbe…if I have SECRET THINGS to say to people on my various filters. Which I do sometimes. However, I will probably not be checking my friends list, as it is from three or four site designs ago and hurts my eyes with its stupid. But I still want to read about every time your cat fucks your best friend in the bathroom at the Cha Cha Lounge, so I supposed I must continue to read actual El Jays. I will find some way to aggregate you people into a feed and form your words with my naked will. Mwee hee heeee…
What will you post about here, yes here, in this blog of blogs?
First of all, stop saying “blog”. That word is a thousand ravenous echidnas rasped across the surface of my brain.
Secondly, I DUNNO! I have great plans in the works, and while I would prefer to come out of the screaming blue with no warning, the vast litter of pulsing maggots left across the Weaselnet by 16-year-old me is prodigious and sickening enough to warrant a Google war. I need people to find this FIRST, you understand? Best to be a solid presence with a definate personality, than the bits and bobs of forgotten Geocities pages and god knows what else…I am frightened.
On the docket:
- Find a way to push to MySpace
- Aggregate latest Kotaku posts in a page and a sidebar
- Aggregate portfolio artworks on a page
- Make splash page
- dicks
- Find a way to pull from LJ (would be nice to have the last few months of public posts up here)
- Tweak fonts and colors, especially in sidebar
- Aggregate comics on a page/sidebar
- run Tuneup to get rid of hideous “/” bug.
- Find out if there’s a fetish for hiccups (answer is automatically “Yes”; any time you ask that question, the mere act of asking it creates the fetish even if one did not exist before)
- MORE TEA. I am drinking this bodacious pomegranate stuff and it sounds limp-wristed, but it’s actually hardcore. HardGAY.
I will almost certainly be irritating about shiny new plugins and whatnot. And gum. I must have more gum.
by
Eliza Gauger on July 3rd, 2006 ~ 08:50:38 PM
Slotted into Meta |
3 Comments »
----------------------------------
Log # 13
Not at SDCC
Fullsize viewings are but a click away.
Rikki asserts that Jhonen will not be at SDCC.
by
Eliza Gauger on July 3rd, 2006 ~ 08:01:27 AM
Slotted into Uncategorized |
No Comments »
----------------------------------
Log # 9
Incredibly Irritating / Bug.
Whenever I edit anything that contains an apostrophe, Wordpress puts a / after it. This is so obnoxious and mysterious that the third time it happened, I gritted my one remaining tooth into a lemon-yellow slush.
The purpose of this post is to test the “jump” feature, ostensibly to use it for large photos later on.
by
Eliza Gauger on July 2nd, 2006 ~ 03:11:27 PM
Slotted into Uncategorized |
1 Comment »
----------------------------------
Log # 8
Ramen Test, Second Edition
This is the second test of the Treo-> Flickr-> Wordpress-> LiveJournal feed system. If all is configured properly, this will autopost across all vectors. Let’s see if it works!
ADDITIONAL: (null)
by
Eliza Gauger on July 2nd, 2006 ~ 02:33:09 PM
Slotted into Uncategorized |
No Comments »
----------------------------------
Log # 6
Holdin’ It Down
This is some crazy shit. I should have set all this up months ago.
I think this is a drawing of a man fucking a tiny hippo while throwing the horns. It is my favorite piece of Seattle graffiti. HOLDIN’ IT DOWN, MAH PEEPS.
by
Eliza Gauger on July 2nd, 2006 ~ 02:17:50 PM
Slotted into Uncategorized |
No Comments »
----------------------------------
Log # 5
Rigorous Testing
This is another test post. It contains an embedded image, blockquotes, links: assorted variables that need to be tested with any new layout. You think it’s amazing.
Lorem ipsum dolor sit amet, consectetuer adipiscing elit. Mauris interdum aliquet ligula. Phasellus egestas, velit vel faucibus rutrum, quam neque auctor neque, at tincidunt mauris orci vitae mi. Curabitur volutpat interdum lorem. Fusce lectus nulla, faucibus vitae, semper vitae, fermentum sed, eros. Ut convallis dapibus purus. Donec lacinia rhoncus dui. Aliquam orci nunc, porta sit amet, cursus in, sagittis in, erat. Ut mattis ante non sem.
Fusce neque nisi, auctor ut, mattis eu, dapibus aliquet, sapien. In laoreet tellus a mi semper mattis. Donec mollis justo at pede. Maecenas vitae ligula non nisl ornare porttitor. Quisque nulla orci, rhoncus ut, sagittis ut, ultrices eget, justo. Ut sit amet lectus. Nunc eget enim vitae urna iaculis pulvinar. Cras elementum nibh eget purus. Class aptent taciti sociosqu ad litora torquent per conubia nostra, per inceptos hymenaeos.
Vestibulum ac neque sed nunc pharetra tristique. Vivamus nec augue. Nam leo felis, commodo vitae, molestie in, condimentum eu, ipsum. Maecenas quam. Quisque tempor odio. Nunc aliquet euismod sem. Vestibulum quis justo porttitor turpis hendrerit tincidunt. Aenean mi. Ut a ipsum. Curabitur mi sem, varius et, condimentum sit amet, posuere vitae, tortor. Aliquam et dolor.
by
Eliza Gauger on July 1st, 2006 ~ 07:54:53 PM
Slotted into Uncategorized |
2 Comments »
----------------------------------
Log # 1
The Goggles Do EVERYTHING
Ha ha ha ha! Freee! FREE FROM LIVEJOURNAL’S FILTHY CLUTCHES!
After oh…six years? Seven? After learning CSS several times over, after thumbing my nose at the new style system, after enduring embarassing URLs and public humiliation…they threw horseflop at me and all I could do was nod weakly.
But it’s over. It’s ON. I am rocking it Web 2.0-style, please aim for my head and/or neck.
