Gibberings
Dad told me never to use XTREE when he wasn’t in the room.
July 18, 2008 ~ 09:58:55 PM * -07:00ST
----------------------------------
Log # 52
I told you.
Behold, the backwards corset in the recent History Channel pirates special.
Really bizarre.
by
Eliza Gauger on July 29th, 2006 ~ 02:20:01 AM
Slotted into Uncategorized |
2 Comments »
----------------------------------
Log # 51
PSP
The PSP is an incredibly sweet little chunk of hardware. Feels good in the hands, has nice sound quality, gorgeous screen, video playback ability, mp3 playback ability, excellent photo storage, display and transfer, built-in Internet connectivity, and mostly-okay controls.
But none of this shit matters unless it’s being USED. Which it is not.
I use my PSP for two things: Syphon Filter, and showing off my illustration portfolio. I keep giant jpegs on a seperate memory card labeled PFOLIO and it is just the ticket for showing people my mad creations. I can zoom wayyyy in and show awesome detail, or pull out and show a widescreen OR tall portrait view of my stuff. And it looks sweet because most of my work is digital anyway. It’s smaller than a printed portfolio and looks better, especially in low light.
It used to be three things. Internet stuff was the third. But I got sick of waiting for a keyboard and use my Treo instead. But I still look at my wee, shinyblack brick of dashed dreams and sigh for what could have been.
How Sony managed to create this really incredible little machine and then completely waste it is a bigger mystery than Dubya going from the highest presidental approval rating EVER, to the Nixon-like pit he inhabits now.
by
Eliza Gauger on July 27th, 2006 ~ 08:12:09 PM
Slotted into Games |
No Comments »
----------------------------------
Log # 50
Comics (Now With 50% More Working Links!)
I was pawing through my most recently-filled sketchbook and realized there’s a lot of stuff in it I’d like to show off. But there’s a lot of work in general that I haven’t posted, that I probably should because I keep TALKING about it.
So here are two things for you to stare at. The first is the first page of ROBOT FINDS KITTEN, which is in a strange ratio and has hideous lettering. I’m going to float it on a black page and redo the lettering.
My plan was to never show the Scientists filled-in, and to always have them be silhouetted by the bright overhead lights of the laboratory. This is proving difficult in the pages that come after this one, so I may abandon that device and draw them normally. Like some sort of normal person. Hurr.
I’ve gone back since I scanned this and pencilled in a few more details, so it will be slightly different later on. I forgot, for example, to put Robot’s speaker on his front.
The second thing is the first page of what was going to be the lead-in to WORSE, which is the only non-ridiculous story I’m working on right now.
WORSE will probably be its own book, while ROBOT FINDS KITTEN, THE DELIVERY and the as-yet-unnamed story about kittens and spaceships will most likely be collected into a single book that is working-titled SPACE AND/OR THE FUTURE. It will act as a depository for all my awesome science fiction vignettes.
But this first page was so agonized over (it took months to plan, and write, and draw, and ink) that I really fucking hate it now and won’t be using it, or the flashback scene it was part of.
You can see my doubt in the overworked appearance, and the stiffness of the characters. Still, it was good practice and helped me work out some yesses and nos in regards to the style of the thing.
The main character, Brose, is seen in his teenage form in the front seat. He’s the blonde. Brose doesn’t even look like this anymore, he’s a lot more sullen and pointy, but he will retain his awkward height.
The girl with big black hair is Mena, Brose’s best friend. She’s part of the supporting cast in WORSE, and star of the book that comes after this one, which is working-titled CRUTCH. It’s about photography.
Mena is called Mena because her mother is an arachnologist and named her after Misumena vatia, the crab spider.
I think my favorite drawing on this page is the chubby goth girl in the vinyl corset. Favorite drawing, I mean, besides the BUS HOBO.
SPRAL peeps, does this scene remind you of anything? Yeah, me too. Not in a bad way, either. Let’s all go to Denny’s.
by
Eliza Gauger on July 23rd, 2006 ~ 12:59:32 AM
Slotted into Comics, Robot Finds Kitten, Uncategorized |
3 Comments »
----------------------------------
Log # 49
Is a Cream Cougar the Latest Craze?
A few days ago I received one of those boring stock investment spams. But the randomly-generated name and subject seemed distinctly deliberate.
From: Dolores Hays (xhcpnurzbg@pricesmart.com)
Subject: stardom inexpensively
And the rest is rust and stardust.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
by
Eliza Gauger on July 20th, 2006 ~ 04:44:48 AM
Slotted into Lolita |
No Comments »
----------------------------------
Log # 48
Literal Gothic Lolita
Vladimir Nabokov, Lolita, Chapter 25
Wanted, wanted: Dolores Haze.
Hair: brown. Lips: scarlet.
Age: five thousand three hundred days.
Profession: none, or "starlet"
Where are you hiding, Dolores Haze?
Why are you hiding, darling?
(I Talk in a daze, I walk in a maze
I cannot get out, said the starling).
Where are you riding, Dolores Haze?
What make is the magic carpet?
Is a Cream Cougar the present craze?
And where are you parked, my car pet?
Who is your hero, Dolores Haze?
Still one of those blue-capped star-men?
Oh the balmy days and the palmy bays,
And the cars, and the bars, my Carmen!
Oh Dolores, that juke-box hurts!
Are you still dancin', darlin'?
(Both in worn levis, both in torn T-shirts,
And I, in my corner, snarlin').
Happy, happy is gnarled McFate
Touring the States with a child wife,
Plowing his Molly in every State
Among the protected wild life.
My Dolly, my folly! Her eyes were vair,
And never closed when I kissed her.
Know an old perfume called Soliel Vert?
Are you from Paris, mister?
L'autre soir un air froid d'opera m'alita;
Son fele -- bien fol est qui s'y fie!
Il neige, le decor s'ecroule, Lolita!
Lolita, qu'ai-je fait de ta vie?
Dying, dying, Lolita Haze,
Of hate and remorse, I'm dying.
And again my hairy fist I raise,
And again I hear you crying.
Officer, officer, there they go--
In the rain, where that lighted store is!
And her socks are white, and I love her so,
And her name is Haze, Dolores.
Officer, officer, there they are--
Dolores Haze and her lover!
Whip out your gun and follow that car.
Now tumble out and take cover.
Wanted, wanted: Dolores Haze.
Her dream-gray gaze never flinches.
Ninety pounds is all she weighs
With a height of sixty inches.
My car is limping, Dolores Haze,
And the last long lap is the hardest,
And I shall be dumped where the weed decays,
And the rest is rust and stardust.*
*[reliqua robigo pulvisque stellarum]
by
Eliza Gauger on July 15th, 2006 ~ 02:31:34 AM
Slotted into Lolita |
No Comments »
----------------------------------
----------------------------------
Log # 47
Futureporn
Slotted into Lolita | No Comments »
Futureporn
I’ve been cruising YTMND a lot lately, and the site has a crapload of internal references, injokes, and websites that members know about and post about a lot. One of these is LiveJasmin, which is ostensibly a cam portal, but not in that “collection of vaguely horrific blondes and broken img srcs in 2001″ sort of way. No, it’s basically a vending machine-shaped site, organized into Girls, Couples and Boys, that has live streaming cams, often with live audio, for every one of its performers.
I clicked around, fascinated, and found that most of the performers were A) foreign and B) bored as hell. Once you clicked on their photo in the portal, it took you to their little cam page, where you saw live video of them, sometimes live audio (usually key clicking and bad pop music), and a scrolling chatlog of every single person who was viewing that cam at that moment. Above the camgirl was a button to buy a “private session” with her. The camgirls looked universally bored, surfing randomly while they waited for someone to buy them.
In every cam’s chatroom, the gist was always the same: people using broken english to try and command the performers, who very occasionally chimed in with a “lol” or “k” but largely ignored their unpaying audience, and other people hitting on their fellow viewers and ignoring the camgirl entirely.
I can’t quite pinpoint why, but the entire setup seemed so blindingly from the future that it truly made me pleased.
by
Eliza Gauger on July 14th, 2006 ~ 01:20:57 AM
Slotted into Future |
4 Comments »
----------------------------------
Log # 46
A reminder, and one of those typically El Jay questions.
The words “fashion” and “mullet” are mutually exclusive.
That said, I pose a mathematical problem: my head + bangs = ___________. Solve for X. You’re being timed.
Problems: bangs are trendy, everyone has ‘em. Hair is curly…issue?
I have a photoshoot on Saturday.
by
Eliza Gauger on July 10th, 2006 ~ 11:55:51 PM
Slotted into Hair, Uncategorized |
No Comments »
----------------------------------
Log # 45
Cans
What sorta headphones is Portman wearing in this pic? I need new fat headphones and I dig the look of the older ones. Recommend me some good ones.
Earbuds just don’t cocoon you from the world like the big ones do, you know? I like to float among you, unencumbered by the noises you make.
by
Eliza Gauger on July 10th, 2006 ~ 01:32:57 PM
Slotted into Uncategorized |
4 Comments »
----------------------------------
Log # 44
Stupid.
I am currently wondering where I can find the contact information for whoever was in charge of hiring Amanda Riley for the History Channel show, True Pirates of the Caribbean.
The actress playing Mary Read had her corset on BACKWARDS the entire show.
Fuckin’ amazing.
EDIT: Ahahaha, I think I found her: http://www.myspace.com/nakedwardrobe
by
Eliza Gauger on July 9th, 2006 ~ 10:15:13 PM
Slotted into Pirates, Uncategorized |
No Comments »
----------------------------------
Log # 43
Bloody Bull Scuffle
This thing had to be at least ten by six feet.
